a MAP... a PRAYER.. hee...

Pencil...

I read this quote by Mother Teresa yesterday
and it stayed with me... :D

"I am a little pencil in the hand of a writing God
who is sending a love letter to the world"

"We are all pencils in the hand of God"

When does Rainbow comes?

n the midst of all the rain.. and all the gloomy times.. well... that was my observation... Rainbow comes during the rain and gloomy times especially when the rain is goin to stop and the gloominess starting to clear.. Is that coincidence? Hmm.. I don't think so.. It is really how God has created it to be such... Cool, isn't it? See the pictures that I have taken when I was in Coventry..... Rainbow appears in the midst of gloom and rain.. and then glimpses of clear sky in the second picture..... bits of the blue sky was visible.. Do you see what I saw? or what I am trying to illustrate? It is like.. Rainbow is a "sign" that gloomy times are going to be over and clear sky will come soon.... Comforting isn't it?

Ezekiel 1:28 (ESV) says, "Like the appearance of the bow that is in the cloud on the day of rain, so was the appearance of the brightness all around. Such was the appearance of the likeness of the glory of the Lord. And when I saw it, I fell on my face, and I heard the voice of one speaking."

I just love His Word..... don't you? *grin* and He put ideas in my mind as I reflect upon His Word.. and He inspires me to scribble away... As I have mentioned before, it is a form of releasing what God has put in my heart.. to be shared with many.. when they are prompted by God to read my scribblings.. Frankly, the world does not need to know me.. They only need to know Jesus.. but if by knowing me could point them to Jesus, I pray He would use me.. I pray I am walking close with God enuf and way much more in order to reflect glimpses of Jesus to people who knows me..

Rainbow... an indication of Hope... and also that God knows what we are going through in our lives, our thoughts, our emotions.. Rainbow is definitely my kind of thing..... my soft spot.. heeeee...

Is this what I am going through? I wonder...

A recent devotion reading says, "If you are going to be used by God, He will take you through a number of experiences that are not meant for you personally at all. They are designed to make you useful in His hands, and to enable you to understand what takes place in the lives of others. Because of this process, you will never be surprised by what comes your way.". How interest this reading was.. and I do wonder whether is this what I am going through currently.. with no job coming along, lots of uncertainties looming ahead.. Hmm.. it is a rather nice way of putting things, don't you think so? This season of waiting is another block of experience to prepare me for what is ahead? I guess I would only know with hindsights in the days to come when I look back at this season of waiting.. awww.. that'd be really fascinating for the days to come.. However, currently, I can honestly say that I have a mix feelings of things.. coz I am still weak.. so, there are times, I feel rather lousy.. but thank God for His strength that sustains me where most times, I feel excited about what is happening currently.. It is really the matter of perspective.. and what I choose to see..

And the devotion reading continues with these questions and reflections, "Are we partakers of Christ’s sufferings? Are we prepared for God to stamp out our personal ambitions? Are we prepared for God to destroy our individual decisions by supernaturally transforming them? It will mean not knowing why God is taking us that way, because knowing would make us spiritually proud. We never realize at the time what God is putting us through— we go through it more or less without understanding. Then suddenly we come to a place of enlightenment, and realize— "God has strengthened me and I didn’t even know it!"" I am longing for that place of enlightenment... and yet realise the need to be in the present and to be available "mindfully"... I could have gotten carried away with my own situation/ circumstance and be completely useless.... I thank God that He remind me all the time about being intentional and being overcomer of my own situation.. and to look at Jesus.. focusing on Him..

Just as 1 Peter 4:12-13 says, "Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed." To choose to rejoice... and then be overjoyed when His glory is revealed in my current situation... His Word holds true.. even if I couldn't see what is ahead.. Like 2 Corinthians 1:5 says "For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows.", He always comfort me... He never fails to do that which is just amazing and very assuring.. Though I can't see what is ahead of me or even be certain of what I am going to do or where I am going to go, His Word is what I am holding on to and not let go. and you know, that is where being headstrong (stubborn in another word) comes in very handy indeed!.. God has His reasons for me to be who I am.. not justifying myself but just merely putting things into perspectives... *wink*

Randomness...

This word just came to my mind as I was thinking what to scribble in my bloggie.. and obviously, looking at the picture I have included in this scribbling shows the randomness of my thoughts.... *wink* Being random at times is a good thing.. as things do surprise me when I am being random in the things that I do or even think about.. especially with the things i do.. or people that I decide to visit or meet... or texts that I have decided to send out..

Anyway, coming back to the picture.. See the little reindeer on top right of the picture? hehe.. that's my new buddy... well, just couldn't resist myself and got him yesterday.. and I named him Brownie.. sweet fella isn't he? Little things like this just makes me happy and thankful about life.. and this is what I need, in a way.. being intentional about things.. Seeing God's goodness in lives around me and in my own life.. Being available to be used by God to touch lives, to encourage, to love.. because these reflect the core of God's heart.. Being random means being flexible and free as God prompts my heart to do.. Amazing stuff will take place... In fact, I have seen lots of amazing taken place in the past as I waited and prayed..

Funny, I always seem to be at a junction of life.. waiting and praying.. and this time round, the waiting seems to be rather long and quiet even..... I do wonder what will take place.. I do wonder what God has in mind.. At one hand, I am excited.. at the other, I am trying to wait gracefully even when it is tough at times..  and a recent devotion I read spoke the very thing that was in my mind which I would like share here today... :) I have highlighted my favorites with Bold and Red.. just my favorite part of the reading... and what has spoken to my spirit..

******

Daily Manna

November 13, 2009

Grace Abounds

By Os Hillman

And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need,
you will abound in every good work

2 Corinthians 9:8

God always knows what we need before we even ask. I recall a few years ago when God was allowing my business to dry up - it happened in order to lead me to an entirely new calling. Lack of provision is one way God leads us to a new place. This was a scary proposition because I had many outstanding obligations to banks and others, and I had to have some significant cash flow to make these payments.

I was ending a consulting contract with a client and saw no prospects for replacing it. Days before the contract expired, I received a call from a new ministry that was consistent with the calling I sensed God was leading me to. They asked me to consult with them for the next year. At the end of that year, I learned that God spoke to the ministry's founder to pay my entire salary out of his own pocket in order to meet the needs I had at that time. This was no insignificant amount either.

At the conclusion of my contract with them, I was wondering where my income was going to come from for the next year. The day before I was informed that their commitment would decrease by 50%, I received a call from the administrator of our foundation. They informed me that a supporter had just given $20,000 to our ministry. God encouraged me through this gift to know that He was my provider.

God equips us to fulfill the mission He has for us. Whenever there is a lack of resources, God is either teaching us to trust Him in greater ways or He is using this to direct our path to new sources of income. Trust the Lord to bring you what you need in the timing that He determines.

Suggested Prayer:

Dear God, Thank you for sending special people into our lives. I can think of a very few who have meant so much to me and been such an encouragement and inspiration. I appreciate them so much...and miss the ones who have left this earth to be with You in eternity. Thank you, God, for the Holy Spirit, the Great Comforter who fills my heart, lifts my spirit, satisfies my soul, and brings your presence into my life. In Jesus' name I pray, amen.

 2 Corinthians 12:9
And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

******

 

Intentionally making life count.. is a lifelong intention.. just like forgiveness.. which is interesting to me.. very interesting, in fact.. so much to learn.. and it is in His timing.. no rush.. no hush about it.. especially when there is the willingness to flow and move according to the leading of the Holy Spirit.... Being in His presence is such an awesome experience regardless what we are going through in life.. It feels real safe and joyful.. It may appear to be foolish and "crazy" to people who do not understand.. or do not know my Almighty God.. My prayer is that more and more people would come to know Him personally and be wonderfully touched in their lives.... and would join me in this journey of life of pleasing Him.. of walking the narrow but secured path in my Lord Jesus.. Not that I am there in "perfection"... I am still very much learning and will always be learning.... because I will always fall short and makes mistakes again and again... that just shows how much I need Jesus to be my guide, counselor and friend... *wink*

Gifts in a ShoeBox...

hmm.. I am just reflecting even as we (Seeds) are to go and buy little gifts to fill many shoeboxes later in the evening.. to be given to kids... Wouldn't it be lovely to see the faces of these kids as the shoeboxes are given to them? The smiles? The joy?

Even as I ponder.... thoughts about my little shoebox of life.... and thoughts about my Giver... and the look of my face when I receive gifts from Him.... Am I thankful? Am I overjoyed? Am I contented? It is amazing to even think about these things... it may be small but yet... meaningful.. sweet in many ways... *wink*

God has said...

"Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you."

So we say with confidence,

"The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?"

(Hebrews 13:5-6)

I am praying and asking God to teach me to be confident in Him.. to hold my head high because I have the Lord as my helper.. He will turn the impossible to possible.. So comforting, isn't it? *grin*

Fruitful day..

I think.. today is another fruitful day.. had my 2nd driving lesson.. bad habits still lingering around.. nevertheless, it has better improvements.. :D Then, it was visiting the recruitment agencies... I was feeling nervy to go but I prayed.. and I told God that it is not by my strength but by His Spirit that I am going.. In a way, I sort of guess what people may say.. However, now, I have done my part to the fullest that I know...... Hmm.. and leave them to God.. I am waiting in anticipation of His miracles to take place at this time when jobs are scarce where the employers are very picky...

As I think about it.. if I do get a job this time round, it is definitely a miracle from God.. and God never fail me..... *wink*

Let God's Word Settle It!...

How comforting this is... and it came in so timely for me.... Thank You O Lord... *grin* Do read on the following daily devotion I received this morning.. :) and be assured and encouraged like me..... heeeee...

Let God's Word Settle It!

Your word is settled in heaven.

Psalm 119:89 NKJV

Dr Martyn Lloyd-Jones writes: 'It is the spirit and the word, the spirit upon the word, and the spirit in us as we read the word.'

You say, 'It's impossible.' God says, '"What is impossible with men is possible with God." ' (Luke 18:27 NIV).

You say, 'I'm exhausted.' He says, '"But those who wait on the Lord, Shall renew their strength… "' (Isaiah 40:31 NKJV).

You say, 'Nobody loves me.' He says, '… "I have loved you with an everlasting love"… ' (Jeremiah 31:3 NIV).

You say, 'I can't go on.' He says, '… "My grace is sufficient for you"… ' (2 Corinthians 12:9 NIV).

You say, 'I don't know what to do.' He says, '… "And He shall direct your paths."' (Proverbs 3:6 NKJV).

You say, 'I can't do it.' He says, '"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."' (Philippians 4:13 NKJV).

You say, 'It's not worth it.' He says, 'we will reap a harvest if we do not give up' (Galatians 6:9NIV).

You say, 'I can't forgive myself.' He says, 'in Christ God forgave you' (Ephesians 4:32 NIV).

You say, 'I can't make ends meet.' He says, 'God shall supply all your need… ' (Philippians 4:19 NKJV).

You say, 'I'm afraid.' He says, 'God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power… ' (2 Timothy 1:7 NKJV).

You say, 'I can't handle this.' He says, 'Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you… ' (Psalm 55:22NIV).

You say, 'I'm not smart enough.' He says, 'if any of you needs wisdom, you should ask God for it… ' (James 1:5 NCV).

You say, 'I'm all alone.' He says, 'I will never leave you nor forsake you'(Hebrews 13:5 NKJV).

Billy Sunday said, 'I stand on God's Word, and if the book goes down, I'll go with it.' Today, let God's Word settle it!

Who is holding your steering wheel of life?

an interesting question to ask.. I would think.....

John 12:24-26 says.. "I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.

The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life."

Reflect on the above verse!.. :) I am.. *wink*

Vroooom.....

hehehe.... I am scribbling as if this is my first time driving on the road!.. well, first time in UK... anyway, kinda fun!.. learning new stuff.. or rather the right techniques.. LOL.. lets see what would happen when I go for the test!.. I am praying from now on... coz I have heard so much horror stories of people going through the test many times before passing..... *grin*

Pass!

Yippee.. I passed!... well.. the driving theory test on Friday... It was kinda nerving actually when I was doing the hazard perception test.. unsure of what score I would get.. especially when my first video clip was scored "zero" due to too many clickings!.. goodness me.. what sort of test is this? Well.. throughout the whole test, I was praying.. and taking deep breathes... and looking at the clips so intensively!.. It was so uncertain and the exact feeling was like just trust God!... :)

well.. well... Had my first attempt at driving in the UK yesterday... and was driving manual on top of that.. ooh.. how tired my feet were..... LOL..... and I personally sensed that God is building up my confidence in doing things.. and to come to Him in everything, every part of my life.. even in driving!.. Sweet... *wink* Also, really thank God for providing the different means of help in various areas of my life.. sending people into my life, to help me.. to teach me.. to laugh with me.. to cry with me.. Just amazing.. Thank You O Lord.. *grin*

a cup of tea......

that's my tea... English tea in this adorable mug which well.. was from my previous rental place.. hehe.. not sure who it belongs to before... well, now, it is mine!.. hahaha.. anyway, one thing I acquire for the past one year of being in UK is to acquire my new found love for tea... I literally drank tea everyday except when I was back in Malaysia or when I know I shouldn't be drinking them... Just enjoy drinking tea as I do my work.. hmm.. what work am I doing especially when I am not working..... hahah.. it is the question of what I do with my time.... and I am learning to really appreciate time that I have.. to do many things, books to read, people to meet.. activities to go for.....

I think today, I am being rather optimistic about many things.. I am actually rather surprise myself to see such optimism... but am really glad to have it.... also, during this time, though my mom is far away back home, I am talking to her much.. about so many things.... "complaining" to her about what had happened and even to talk about anything under the sky.. I guess, really.. this is one thing I treasure much and in a way, it is worth to be away from home.. to be able to recognise in greater depth that my mom and dad are the most important people in my life other than Jesus.. and that no matter how many times I fall and make mistakes, they are there to support me.. the sacrifices they made go beyond words could describe.. really.. I am truly blessed by God for putting me into their lives..... they just give me such liberty and freedom to try new things..

and in this time, I am also trying to read this book.. by David Pawson, a renown bible teacher.. "Unlocking the bible...... " what better time to have this time of my life to discover more about His Truth in His Living Word..... I really hope to be able to cultivate such habit in reading His Word with eagerness and desire to learn and grow; especially so when I get busy in the days to come, with work and other stuff..... I know the Lord is helping me.. He is showing me the way.. *grin*

Do we have questions?

what questions are they? What are they about? I remembered last Tuesday at Alpha course, the speaker shared about people carrying lots of questions in their lives... People with big, huge and heavy question marks.. sometimes, because they are so heavy and huge, it makes the "carrier" so tired and even cause the "carrier" to timble tumble all over in the journey of life.... The challenge was to set aside these question marks and ...... look at life..... and more importantly, look at what Lord Jesus is telling us... Hmm...... I thought it was really profoundly well said by the speaker..... and I just love the way he illustrated it....

Well.. tonight is another night of Alpha...... I am praying that His truth would truly sprout in the hearts of the guests of Alpha..... Seeds have been sown.. it is really about God working in the hearts of people and helping them to come to that place of awe and praise to the Living God..... That is my prayer today for all the alpha courses that are running this week in every part of the UK as well as worldwide.... Even as I scribble and pray, I could feel a spiritual sense of movement..... How to explain it? hmm.. words just not able to describe it.. except to feel it as we pray...... the move of God....

Embracing life..

Aww.. this phrase just popped into my mind today as I think about today and what had taken place.. with not being successful in my hazard test.. and yet pass with with flying colors for the multiple choice questions.... But the end result is that I have to take both all over again.. and I am gonna do that this coming Friday...

Thinking about it.. guess, the lesson learnt here is that sometimes, we can never really know how to be ready for things..... well.. for example, the hazard test..... I thought it would not be that difficult and yet because I have missed out on how to tackle it, I didn't get through it.. Well, that's my 31pounds lesson learnt...... and of course, it is hard on the "pride" department.... but well, embracing life is also about embracing "failures" as well as "successes"..... That is really the fun of things.... well, if I look at it optimistically..... I could have chosen to mourn over it.. and be depressed.. but what good would it do to me? Nothing!.. In fact, it would only make me feel miserable and down...

Well.. I think God is teaching me to embrace life more gracefully... embracing failures with a tinch of optimism or maybe more?.... to learn and to grow..... to actually be joyful in spite of situations.... to rejoice in the Lord!.. :) Is this radical? hmm.. For me, I guess it is.... and I am enjoying it much more than few months ago... To lead a radical life.. one that is full with excitements and challenges..... with one utmost and constant source of life = Jesus!..... yippeeeeee....

Traffic Signs? Theory test?

This whole weekend is all about traffic signs.. about the dos and don'ts of driving.. bla blah.. coz I am going for a test on Monday!.. It is ages since I went for such test.. hmm.. Well, just have to go through it again because I am in a new country.... it is really like I am starting anew..... the process of starting anew started last year and it is still in the progress.. time consuming and sometimes can be frustrating but it is rewarding at the end.... and it is something which God has blessed me with... *grin* well.. I am off to be swimming with traffic signs and etc etc... heeee...

On a sunday morning 940am...

I was sitting on a bench with the view above.. in a cool breezy day.. filled with much inspiration to scribble and I did.... the thought that came on sunday morning (18.10.09) as I was sitting there by myself was ... hmm.. A journey to be travelled alone and yet in the midst of many.. And in this instance, 'alone' is not a bad thing.. There is a need for time to be alone.. It is something to be discovered even more, something personal.. and it can be real fun because I am not really alone.. as God is with me all the time.. His love just overwhelms me inside out..

It just amazes me to see many things taking place... how little things seem to be unfolding, as it were.. I know I am excited.. and I am asking God what does all these means? and just reflecting of what I have been involving in the past weeks and months.. while I wait in God.. Being involved in lives is something God has put in my heart to do and yet sometimes, it can be risky.. as I am exposing myself to be vulnerable.. To be involved in lives require myself to be as transparent and true as possible to others.. hmm.. yet, it is so rewarding to see lives being touched and encouraged.. I am so thankful that I am able to see that truth.. and to experience such blessings....

well..... some of the stuff that I was reflecting on that sunday were truly personal and life-changing thoughts.. it shall go to my little journal instead of here.. But, truly.. sitting there at the bench, observing people coming and going, reflecting and thinking was truly refreshing to my soul....... and I am really glad that I heeded His voice to go somewhere and spend time alone with Him on that sunday morning..... *grin*

when the oceans rise and thunders roar......

I will soar with God above the storm................

Just want to share this song here... eventhough it has been there for years now.. Hmm.. It just spoke of my heart at the current state... being still and know He is my God..... finding rest in Christ alone... what an assurance.. what love He pours into my life...

*feeling so warm and so loved*

Inspirations flooding in....

Hmm.. I wonder... am I getting more inspirations to scribble for the coming weeks? I just wonder.. Hmm.. well, I feel excited about things and yet at the same time, I want to walk closely with Him.. I desire to be in line with Him in all that I do..

Though at the moment I may not see it, I just have this tinkling feeling that many beautiful things would take place in the coming weeks...... It has begun.... and I know deep down that God would surprise me again and again.... yippee..... can't wait to be surprised by Him!.. *wink*

And, I thought the photo I have taken last Saturday was just appropriate for this post....... the pathway.. walking the pathway of life.. It is a journey.. and, as I walk this journey of life, I am experiencing many stuff... and God is walking with me..... teaching me to appreciate His people.. to appreciate His nature.. more and more.... how awesome could this get? no words to describe except to be awed by Him.......... *grin*

"Some time later the brook dried up......."

the title phrase was taken from 1 Kings 17:7... and the story of Elijah that I am going to scribble about here was taken from 1 Kings 17:1-16... and this was shared at my church in the UK (St John's) a week ago..... Below is the passage; New International Version...

******

1 Kings 17:1 - 16

Elijah Fed by Ravens

1 Now Elijah the Tishbite, from Tishbe in Gilead, said to Ahab, "As the LORD, the God of Israel, lives, whom I serve, there will be neither dew nor rain in the next few years except at my word."
2 Then the word of the LORD came to Elijah: 3 "Leave here, turn eastward and hide in the Kerith Ravine, east of the Jordan. 4 You will drink from the brook, and I have ordered the ravens to feed you there."
5 So he did what the LORD had told him. He went to the Kerith Ravine, east of the Jordan, and stayed there. 6 The ravens brought him bread and meat in the morning and bread and meat in the evening, and he drank from the brook.

The Widow at Zarephath

7 Some time later the brook dried up because there had been no rain in the land. 8 Then the word of the LORD came to him: 9 "Go at once to Zarephath of Sidon and stay there. I have commanded a widow in that place to supply you with food." 10 So he went to Zarephath. When he came to the town gate, a widow was there gathering sticks. He called to her and asked, "Would you bring me a little water in a jar so I may have a drink?"

11 As she was going to get it, he called, "And bring me, please, a piece of bread."
12 "As surely as the LORD your God lives," she replied, "I don't have any bread—only a handful of flour in a jar and a little oil in a jug. I am gathering a few sticks to take home and make a meal for myself and my son, that we may eat it—and die."
13 Elijah said to her, "Don't be afraid. Go home and do as you have said. But first make a small cake of bread for me from what you have and bring it to me, and then make something for yourself and your son. 14 For this is what the LORD, the God of Israel, says: 'The jar of flour will not be used up and the jug of oil will not run dry until the day the LORD gives rain on the land.' "
15 She went away and did as Elijah had told her. So there was food every day for Elijah and for the woman and her family. 16 For the jar of flour was not used up and the jug of oil did not run dry, in keeping with the word of the LORD spoken by Elijah.

******

The preacher emphasized "radical obedience"... looking at how Elijah stepping out in faith and in obedience.. and as Elijah did that, surprisingly, the brook dried up some time later which indicates that obedience could also bring us to a place of barrenness and of lack... It is not a sign or indication of disobedience.. Instead, it is in that place of waiting and of lack, God challenges the picture of us putting Him in the Box... It is in those times that we really see what is inside us and how much do we really trust Him....... I find this particularly interesting. Why so? well.. somehow, I felt that I am at that place of lack.. that place of waiting..... hmm..

So, why did God takes Elijah to that place of barrenness and of lack? looking at the passage above, we could see that God uses that and Elijah to bring about a miracle for Elijah.... On top of that, it is also to bring supernatural provision to a widow and her son.. In another words, bringing blessings to others. And the preacher shared that miracle happens when we run out of our own resources... and that the only people who get miracles are those who need them..... Much truth to chew on and yet, I just able to identify with them..

Finally, the preacher also stated that those waiting times are also birthing times... to birth desires within... It is when God wants to birth something deep inside....... Deep, huh? profound, most definitely..... And it excited me as I listened to the sermon that day...... It triggered much thoughts and I just want to run to God to talk to Him about them....... heeeeee...